Many parents of students with disabilities don’t know where to start in advocating for their children’s needs and best interests in school. They may need help from an educator, advocate, or other professional to ‘translate’ what works best for their child as well as desired goals and objectives into formal special education programming. The strategies below can support parents and older students to effectively communicate their needs.

At-home Strategies and Schedules: One of the best tools you have as a caregiver is knowing what works for your child at home. You know your child better than anyone, especially with challenges, new situations, and the workarounds you utilize at home. Use these to your advantage when collaborating to build behavior plans, goals, and ways to motivate and help your student.

Personal Stories: Never discount the use of personal narratives in building relationships and bridging understanding. Bringing your story to the table as a parent can help teachers to see a fuller picture of your family values and give them ways to best engage you and your child.

Communication Styles: Always express your communication style and how you’d like teachers to address you, from your name (rather than calling you ‘Mom’) to whether you prefer to meet over the phone or in person about your child. Be sure to share with everyone involved in your child’s care about what helps you to feel most involved and empowered in the partnership between you and the school.

Accessibility: Parents can need accommodations, too. Ensuring that everyone feels comfortable accessing special education materials and meetings is essential. Speak up and ask for need accommodations such as slowing down the meeting, a list of acronyms and their meanings, or a translation or interpreter. This is also a great way to model self-advocacy for your child!

Parent Engagement: Parents can sometimes struggle to be engaged with the school if they have more immediate needs or priorities. Understanding a home situation can give others a lot of insight as to how to relate to and better serve your family. With this understanding the school may be able to offer meetings closer to your home, at flexible times, or on definitive pre-arranged dates; to ensure that you are able to attend and participate fully. Voice your needs and preferences to ensure these meetings happen at your convenience and without significant barriers for you and your family.

Knowing the ‘Right’ Questions to Ask: Sometimes in the moment, it’s hard to think of the right questions to ask or remember what to say. We recommend making a list of questions (especially pooling some by using a Google search, reviewing your child’s report card or evaluations, combing through the IEP, or procedural safeguards, etc.) Getting information from a variety of sources can help you to form questions and thoughts helpful to these meetings with schools.

Helpful Information and Individuals: Understood.org is a great place to start with basic definitions, processes, and some information about special education law. Local resources in the DC area include:

• Advocates for Justice and Education
• Children’s Law Center
• Office of the Ombudsman for Public Education
• Office of the Student Advocate
• Office of Civil Rights
• Office of Dispute Resolution 
• Parents Amplifying Voices in Education (PAVE) 
• The Arc of DC
• Quality Trust for Individuals with Disabilities, and various other organizations.

Preparation: One of the best ways to walk into a meeting with teachers and administrators feeling empowered is having your ‘ducks in a row’. Organizing your own data and evidence including a list of concerns and/or observations, paperwork such as evaluations, a list of questions you have about the process, next steps, and a notebook for notes and information about who to contact, you’ll be feeling powerful and like a part of the team. If your child already has an IEP or 504 Plan, be sure to bring a copy, highlight parts you wish to discuss, and most of all, know your rights as a parent of a child with a disability.

It isn’t going to be easy: There can be personal and sensitive topics to discuss about your child, their ability and behavior, and there will likely be times you and the school team may disagree on what’s best for them. However, remind yourself that you are an equal team member and the most important person in your child’s life to ensure their success. You are responsible for helping them acquire the best possible education for them through holding others accountable, ensuring their progress, and partnering with their teachers to steer the ship of your child’s school journey. Sometimes it will feel as though the process is slow or you must talk to several people before finding the right one to address specific concerns. It’s all part of the process. Remember that you have rights as a parent/caregiver, and that there are timelines that must be followed. Most importantly, knowledge is power; but the relationships between you and your child’s school are important to nurture as well to get the best possible results.